The Bun Life - Secret Admirer Uncovered/Exposed

As you all know, I talk about Baby Fwan a lot, and Tumps, but I do have 2 other bunnies: Fuzzby and Sydney. They are both setup in my office, one with a playpen on one side, the other one with one on the opposite side. So they can see each other if they position themselves right. I have tried to bond them but Fuzzby has a Pseudomonas infection that she just can't shake and I can't risk Sydney getting sick. Plus, Fuzzles is an older bun and I don't want her to get hurt if their is a fight. Sydney, aka Squibbles, is a doll when you hold him but when his feet hit the ground he transforms into El Loco De Rabbito and charges at absolutely anything.

He is so funny, he charges me when I mess around in his area, he sacrifices his whole body as a battering ram and just plows into me, of course he weighs less than a toothpick so it really is quite comical. He can bite though, and bites me all the time. They are not kill bites, they don't even break the skin, it is just a warning to remind me that he aint one to be messed with. However, he never bites when you hold him, he LOVES to groom you, he must think your arm is an ice cream cone or something.

Fuzzles on the other hand, has HUGE eyelashes, like Betty Boop, and never hurts anyone. Poor Fuzzles just wants peace and quiet, she is like one of the Golden Girls who just wants to play Bridge in the afternoons, come home and watch Wheel of Fortune, and then head off to bed. So, I just don't see how her life could mix with Sydney the charging jackass nutcase, you know? BUT, anyway, nonetheless, I was going through Squibbles room (playpen) and in the drawer, under some jeans, I found a letter he wrote to Fuzzy yet hadn't dropped in the mail yet.

Naturally, the first thing that pops into my head is, "How did my bunny get such beautiful handwriting?" Anyway, here is what the letter said:

"Dearest Fuzz Fuzz,

You probably remember me from when we first met, I know that didn't go so well, if my memory serves me right I think I face humped you and tore a small patch of fur off. Sorry about that, I just get incredibly nuts around beautiful women, I mean bunnies. Anyway, I been watching you from afar, actually about 3 feet, and I must say, did you lose weight?? You look amazing!! You have the fluffiest white and gray tail I have ever seen. That perfume you wear is decadent, by the way is that the new Moose Urine that's out? It is to die for.

Anyway, not to bore you with small talk, but I wanted you to know that I am really shy and can't express myself the way I would like. So I write you this letter, I hope you speak English, and can read it as well, because I want to know if you would like to go out with me some time? Maybe we can go out for a hay cube or something, or go rent a Bunny Bungalow for the weekend? Okay, I know I am probably moving too fast for you, but I feel my life is gonna be short. That mean huge big fat white rabbit from the other side of the tracks (living room) has sworn to others that he will cause my demise eventually.

I can't stand that big white bully, and his ugly girlfriend, you know who I'm talking about right? Man, she looks like she fell off the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down! She went to a haunted house and came out with an application!! What is she anyway? She doesn't look like any bunny breed I ever saw. Anyway, she is not one of us, she is a sheltered spoiled bun who was born at a rescue, not RESCUED like us. That means she was loved from the get go, while we suffered in the hands of human trash. Do I sound bitter? Sorry, I just get passionate about the cause.

Hopefully, you will accept my invitation and, if you want, I can sneak out one night and come see you? I promise, I will bring my own litter box. Okay, bye my dearest Fuzzy Wuzzles, til next time.

Love always,
Sid"

Man, that is incredible, Sydney has an impressive vocab!

8 comments:

  1. That was a lovely letter Sydney. Went in a haunted house and came out with an app? That is one of the best lines ever. Has anyone ever looked at your eyes? You could be charging at stuff because you cant see very good huh bunny man? You and Mizz Fuzzy are very lucky buns!

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  2. oh what a lovely letter, so romantic!

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  3. Awwww. Maybe his letter will be delivered soon?

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  4. Oohh, no, sorry, I can't deliver his letter, it didn't have a stamp. Plus, he wrote the address as "Somewhere in the office at Jim's House" so I don't think the postal worker could narrow that down very well.

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  5. He doesn't seem to have poor vision, he finds things when I toss them over his head, like toys and stuff. Let me tell you, if I put him in your arms, you would never want to let go. I brought him to Nancy's house for New Year's once and he got passed around like a joint for 8 hours. He was loving it! Two women took turns napping with him, lol, it was so funny. The one incredible thing is his attachment to me. He hates other rabbits it seems but is very hooked on me. I brought him to the rescue to try and find a bond partner, and we set him up in a big playpen area in Nancy's livingroom and the whole time I walked around setting things up, Nancy said that he watched me like a hawk. He does that to this day, When I walk around the room he follows me with his eyes and then goes to whatever side of the cage that I am on the side of the room of. Very funny. When I lived with my parents, I would set him up in the hallway and it was the hallway to the bathroom. Every time my mom wanted to get to the bathroom he would hold the hallway hostage!!

    All I would hear is, "Jimmy! Come get this crazy rabbit! He won't let me pass!" I would have to go pick him up and let my Mom pass. She loves him though too. She was definitely NOT a rabbit person before we had bunnies. When we got Thumper, she fell in love with him instantly, we all did, how could you not? Then we got Baby Fwan, then Sydney, then I moved out, then I got Fuzzles for El Sid, but that never panned out, so they are separated. Nancy asked me if I wanted to bring Fuzzy back and try another bunny because it didn't work out. I said thank you but I could never do that.

    Fuzzy has had a hard life, and when she came in she looked awful, Donna at ACC was asked if she thought she should be euthanized because she was such in bad shape. Donna decided not to and took Fuzzles to the rescue. She is an older bun and I feel that the human race owes her the rest of her life to be spent in peace and comfort. And if I took her back then it is just one more person failing her.

    I have tried just about every thing possible to get rid of her sneezing but to no avail, so I just decided to stop harassing her with it and let her be. If it starts to get real bad I will start medicating her again, but it hasn't gotten worse or better, just stays the same. Poor Fuzzy Buzzles.

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  6. I know what you mean. Once a bunny comes to my house they are never going anywhere. I think sometimes with their health we can only get to a stable point and that is it. My Haven is that way.

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  7. What a beautiful letter Sydney. So sad that you two star crossed lovers can only admire each other from afar.

    Jim, you crack me up. Fuzzles is like one of the Golden Girls?! and the whole bit about the big fat white rabbit and his ugly girlfriend?! I look forward to your posts all week, is that sad??

    Thanks for posting the slideshow, btw. I was beginning to wonder what Sydney and Fuzzles looked like...

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  8. Sad, I don't think I am in a position to call anyone sad, since the most exciting part of my week is guessing which part of the couch Frannie will try to destroy lol.

    Yeah, I can't give a bun back, I don't think any of us ever could, unless we couldn't take care of it or some special circumstances.

    Sydney and the lops are sworn enemies, and Sydney would cut off is nose to spite his face. Very crazy bunny rabbit, but an ABSOLUTE DOLL. Is that a contradiction or what? If you held him you would agree, especially when you went to put him down. He hates to be picked up, or put down. His motto is, if your gonna pick me up then you better keep me forever!! Or I'll shred your ankles!!

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