Yeah right, not a chance! How about a thousand fruit flies?? I can FedEx them to you if you want! Anyway, what are your bunnies like? For some reason I think my bunnies are defective. It is like a morgue or a nursing home in here for Pete's sake. The bunnies just veg out all day and night sleeping, rolling over, sleeping some more, eat some hay, sleep, carrots, back to sleeping. I watch tons of YouTube videos of people and their bunnies doing cartwheels, backflips, side kicks, house work, furniture moving, and more cool stuff. Then I look over at my bunnies, and I'm lucky if they so much as jiggle an eyebrow at me!!
Then I have to deal with the exact polar opposite when going into my office, Sydney NEVER sleeps, he "trains" all day. Naturally, your next question would be, "Trains for what?" That would be the big fight. What fight? The one he is gonna have with me the next time I go into the lion's den to change his water and hay. This bunny is the Anti-Christ, you have no clue. He doesn't sleep, he stays up all night drinking coffee and popping No-Doze. He sits on, or under, my bed, I mean HIS bed, and sharpens his claws with the ankle bones of past victims. He growls, no not grunts, growls. It sounds like 40 midgets with an upper respiratory infection, a foul growl from the depths of bunny hell. I swear, I feel like I am in a domestic violence situation over here. I can see it now, me going to meetings to get support for my bunny beating me. The group would tell me that, "If he has done it once, he will do it again" and then I will counter with , "Well, I do instigate most of the fights by going to change his water, he really loves me and he bought me flowers last time. He said he won't saw off my ankle again" Then everyone will help me get the kids (Thumps and Fwan) to a safe house while I deal with El Syd.
I never met a bunny that was willing to sacrifice his whole body to use a furry battering ram. What the hell is wrong with him? What a lunatic. I got the golden girls who sleep all day and then the psychotic nutcase who NEVER sleeps. I swear, he doesn't even have eye lids, he don't need them!! His breed of psychotic dwarfs have evolved so much that the eye lids were not needed, due to the fact he stays up FOREVER!! No matter what time, day or night, he is waiting for me by the gate, waiting for me to enter to change his water and hay and food, so he can surgically remove a chunk of my Achilles heel. Then you pick him up and he is a doll, what gives??
Thumps and Fwan, in between sleeping shifts, sit at the gate and watch as he shreds my feet to powder. They stand around like neighbors watching the SWAT team raid a nearby crack house. I can hear Baby Fwan now, "Oh my, look at that! Jim lost another toe, Think that he will still be able to pick me up without that toe?" then Thumps will roll his eyes, "Oh would you stop with the picking me up crap already?? Who Cares!!!"
EVIL BUNNIES!!!!
I never met a bunny that was willing to sacrifice his whole body to use a furry battering ram. What the hell is wrong with him? What a lunatic. I got the golden girls who sleep all day and then the psychotic nutcase who NEVER sleeps. I swear, he doesn't even have eye lids, he don't need them!! His breed of psychotic dwarfs have evolved so much that the eye lids were not needed, due to the fact he stays up FOREVER!! No matter what time, day or night, he is waiting for me by the gate, waiting for me to enter to change his water and hay and food, so he can surgically remove a chunk of my Achilles heel. Then you pick him up and he is a doll, what gives??
Thumps and Fwan, in between sleeping shifts, sit at the gate and watch as he shreds my feet to powder. They stand around like neighbors watching the SWAT team raid a nearby crack house. I can hear Baby Fwan now, "Oh my, look at that! Jim lost another toe, Think that he will still be able to pick me up without that toe?" then Thumps will roll his eyes, "Oh would you stop with the picking me up crap already?? Who Cares!!!"
EVIL BUNNIES!!!!
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lol. Was Sydney that scary when he was penned and sharing the room with Fuzzby (RIP)?
ReplyDeleteI've heard laziness is a lop thing. Mine have their energy spurts now and again, but during the day they're like waking the dead.
Scary? Well let's be honest, he weighs about as much as a flea and has a cute button nose. Not exactly the definition of fright if you know what I mean. Was he this nutso about his territory? Absolutely, he just didn't have that much to be nutso about. Now he has my, I mean his bed, and half the room. It is pretty hilarious actually, I get a real kick out of it, he basically tries to maul me when I go in his area, and the whole time I can just lean down and pick him up and he is INSTANTLY all cuddly and sweet. Strangest thing I ever saw. He really is the craziest and the most affectionate bunny I have ever seen, all in one.
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